Kiwi On The Loose

A friend alerted me to the term ‘dag’ being great for this blog category. AND to be honest it was my next term to add. I don’t use it much BUT its such a ‘kiwi’ term, it evokes so many things ‘kiwi’.

What is a DAG?

In is most down to earth sense and rawest use, a DAG is the poohs of a sheep that colects on the wool around a sheeps backside as it exits and falls to the ground. It builds up and collects on the wool around that area of the sheeps anatomy.NOW remember sheep like humans have poohs that arrives in the outer world in differing consistencies. Sometimes it get VERY runny and this is termed as the sheep having ’scours” (please dad help me here with the spelling)

SO the collective build up of sheep droppings collect on the wool and it dries in hot weather or stays moist, BUT a build up it is nonetheless.

That is a DAG, and such terms as ‘rattle your dags’ comes from them looking like rattles hanging around the sheeps bum.

Before the sheep is shorn FARMERS remove the dags for the shearers. This process is called ‘crutching’.

Heres what ‘wiki’ says about dags.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DAG

I will try and find a photo soon.

One of the reasons sheep are ‘crutched’ is to stop flies doing annoying things at that end of the sheep because of the attractive morsels there..

There are offshots to this term ‘DAG’, which I will explore in other posts. PERHAPS others could add to it.

They include such terms as ‘a bit of a dag!’, FRED DAG himself, rattle your dags etc.

The term kiwi in America to most means a small hairy fruit, known as a kiwi.

You find it in fruit stands, on signs..etc reinforcing this veiw of kiwi being a fruit.

Personally I don’t want to be a fruit, like I am on Queer Nation or something.

A KIWI is a person from the country known as New Zealand/Aotearoa.

Some Americans are aware of this country and often comment on its beauty.

In New Zealand what Americans call a kiwi we call a ‘Kiwifruit’.

This writer remembers a time when the ‘kiwifruit’ was called a ‘Chinese Gooseberry’.

Just to add to the confusion. ………..

BUt Sir Edmund Hillary the first man to climb the highest mountain in the world (Mt Everest) was a ‘kiwi’. He was certainly no fruit.

Hi, I thought it would be fun to start a glossary for Americans on kiwi speak, to promote understanding. Yes sometimes the response to a brilliant cross cultural statement might be, "I beg your pardon?" This is accompanied by a blank look, eyes kind of glazed……the non comprehende, non stoned glaze. So here we go………I think if we stick to one word per post it might catalogue better. Maybe a plugin will collate it all.

Well here I am trying to be funny on a gorgeous sunny fall day in Denver that still feels like summer . Its been great to be out and about, having my weekly cup of coffee x 3 with some really lovely people. I was reading last night about coffee inhibiting some kind of beta type brain waves BUT today life seemed better, the future manageable and the mountains a little less obstacle like. OF COURSE  this all could have been due to the fact that I had been wearing my orange biking sun glasses and thinking I was BONO walking thru K Mart with a beautiful women.

ORANGE could just do that to my brain waves and maybe my thinking it was coffee is not right @ all.

I have come to love copy opps! I mean coffee, BUt I don’t drink it daily, only on special occasions. TWAS funny though, last week Susan and I went to have coffee @ Starbucks, we ordered a couple of HazelNut lattes. Well part way thru sitting outside in the sun discussing sugar and the ills it has added to society WE realised we weren’t drinking HAZELNUT lattes @ all but iced lattes. Being a couple of onto it Da Vinci’s that kind of oblivious may seem hard to believe. After a brief discussion, me wussing out not to bother BUT Susan being the up front consumer she is , inside she went in to the guy and  pointed this out. We hadn’t ordered iced coffee. They laughed together as you do around Susan, (otherwise known as The ‘Q’. Q for qwerky, Qute (very), Qwackers and Qwarazy and very to all those too). Afer laughing the guy gave us 2 MORE coffees PLUS our old ones BACK for good PR saying they only cost the company 6 cents. I thought MATE !! you shouldn’t tell us that kind of info. This was before the 700 billion dollar package of course!. So now we are FOUR coffees (and 24 cents real cost) but wait there’s MORE.

See what ORANGE has done to me today. Here’s a photo to prove it.

AND NOW back to the story.

We are outside in the sun again, listening to Russian being spoken at a table next to us WHEN sipping away and still thinking about sugar and Susan says “HazelNut lattes are sweet enough anyway”. I think or taste and go hmmmmmmm……………we realise THESE R NOT hazelnut lattes either. WELL Susan can’t resist and off she goes again to take on daddy Starbucks.

Again she returns with two more real HazelNut lattes PLUS our old ones. SO now we are SIX. We have them in a nice tray holding 4 cups. So off we go. We had paid around 7 buks for the TWO coffees, we cost the company, 36cents and we walked away with SIX cups of coffee, two of which we had drunk of course.

Not bad, especially since we drunk them all that day and managed to sleep that night.

So that’s the coffee story.

MY THINKING I WAS FUNNY in my blog title today had nothing to do with coffee BUT was becoz I am using Adobe Contribute to update my blog now…..which while its a learning curve, I am finding it is quite a bit easier………

Hence Contributing School…………….ha ha hee hhe…..Does anyone else get my word plays or am I in a class of my own???? Not the top class either.  I am sure it is healthy to find yourself funny…..but some people when they find out you think you are funny suddenly become serious and you aren’t FUNNY@ALL. TODAY I am funny……I can laugh at myself………and may it continue. The DOWs falling, I am 7,000 miles from my family and home…..I am ON TOUR In AMERICA, which could be depressing if you listened to the news all day, BUT I can laugh today………..that’s gotta be good.

So I think this Contributing School is great. Makes updating my blog and schpeeling easier. I need to schpeel, there’s so much to think about here. THANKS Adobe, I am glad I am in your class.

Hey thanks for reading this. Please leave a comment or register. Feeling like you are talking to yourself may be practice for my solitary confinement one day but don’t be shy…………. why am I the only loudmouth in the world.